Categories
Nearly Coherent Technology

Nearly Coherent: You Got Doodie Hands

There’s a new episode of Nearly Coherent!

eD! and Jeff get all nerd-horny over everything announced at WWDC. It’s real steamy, folks!

Come for my opinions on all the WWDC stuff, stay for the message Jeff now wants to use as his bedtime alarm tone!

Categories
Technology

Apple Announces iPad Pro Updates

Apple announced a new version of the iPad Pro today, and, folks, spare a thought for my bank account, ’cause I wants it.

In the way of actual updates, it’s more or less what we’d all expect — a faster A12Z Bionic processor, WiFi 6 networking, which (with the right router) can allow download speeds of 1.2 Gbps (up from 866Mbps), and support for 30 different LTE cellular networking bands, up from 29.

That one band will make all the difference, I’m sure!1Full disclosure: I am not sure.

Apple also announced mouse and trackpad support will come with iPadOS 13.4, which will be released on March 24th — that’s the one thing Jeff has been asking me about for months, so he’ll be extremely happy with that.

Finally, Apple announced a new Magic Keyboard, which won’t be out until May, which sucks ’cause I want it now, dammit!

Would’ja look at that thing?!

It has a trackpad, backlit keys (that use the scissor switches that Apple has mercifully gone back to on the 16″ MacBook Pro and new MacBook Air, also announced today), a USB-C port with passthrough power for your iPad, and viewing angles that I cannot wait to try, just take my money Tim Apple.

There’s a bunch more details about the new iPad Pro on MacStories. Give it a read, but hide your Apple Card while you do.

Categories
Entertainment Meta News Technology

Nearly Coherent: The Juwanna Mann Standard

There’s a new episode of Nearly Coherent!

eD! and Jeff discuss Jeff’s luxurious beard, Standing Up, Falling Down, and a new smartphone case eD! can’t stop thinking about.

Yes, the writer of the movie is my cousin, but that doesn’t mean it’s not an excellent movie, and doesn’t deserve the love we heap upon it.

Categories
Entertainment Meta News Technology

Nearly Coherent: Jeff 2024

There’s a new episode of Nearly Coherent!

eD! and Jeff discuss Valentine adventures, the price of trumpets, terrible Twitter takes, and things that could tank Jeff’s theoretical political campaign!

This episode also features the third-dumbest question ever asked on the podcast, which I more or less absolutely loved. You really should give it a listen.

Categories
Entertainment Meta News Technology

Nearly Coherent: Like an R-Rated Mr. Rogers

There’s a new episode of Nearly Coherent!

eD! and Jeff talk about new dinosaurs, the Oscars, and being so very old oh man it’s terrible.

I really liked this episode, and I hope you do, too. If not, as always, Blame Dave©.

Categories
Entertainment Meta News Technology

Nearly Coherent: Things You Shouldn’t Do in a Hospital

There’s a new episode of Nearly Coherent!

eD! and Jeff talk about Joker.

And spoil every last thing in it.

Don’t say we didn’t warn you and tweet at us angrily later.

As I mention in the episode, I love all sorts of movies — I’m the person you’ll find at a showing of Gone with the Wind and the sort of weirdo who pre-ordered Fast and Furious Presents: Hobbs and Shaw about 12 seconds after I got out of the theater. I’m not going to dismiss a movie outright for just about any reason.

That said, Joker was terrible and I want the time I spent on it back, dammit.

Batman 1966's Joker, clapping.

Categories
Entertainment Technology

Microsoft the Musical

The bit in the beginning where they consider Bill Gates less of a person and more of an idea is kinda weird, but the part where they make fun of Windows Phone really makes up for it.

Categories
Linkin' Log Technology

An iPhone 11 Pro Review For Dogs (And Their Owners)

Buzzfeed News, with the sort of tech review I can get behind:

My dogs and I have spent the past few days with the iPhone 11 Pro Max, and I think they would agree when I say that it is an excellent camera for humans who enjoy photographing dogs. As a test of camera performance, dogs are my gold standard: They don’t stay still, and capturing their details (fur in particular) is a challenge. Not only is the iPhone 11 Pro Max capable of taking dog photos of great variety and visual accuracy, it can take them in the low-light conditions dogs so enjoy and with studio effects that do a good job of making them appear as adorable as they truly are.

This has replaced the TechCrunch review of the iPhone 6 and 6 Plus as my favorite iPhone review of all time, which is a ranking that I’m not proud of having but what can you do, y’know?

the simpsons nerd GIF
What I imagine my life will be like in the future having admitted to ranking iPhone reviews.
Categories
Entertainment Meta News Technology

Nearly Coherent: Midnight Green Is the Dave of Colors

There’s a new episode of Nearly Coherent!

eD!, Jeff, and Dave talk about the new iPhones 11, Apple Watch Series 5, and all the other shenanigans from Apple’s event on Tuesday.

Find out how many shiny new things I’ll own by next week, it’ll shock and amaze you!

Categories
Linkin' Log News Technology

Apple Announces Release Date for PowerBeats Pro in Navy, Other Colors I Don’t Care About

At this point I was kinda figuring Apple wouldn’t announce the release date of the PowerBeats Pro in navy before my next work trip, but I was mercifully wrong!

So far, the excellent Beats Powerbeats Pro true wireless earbuds have only been available in black, but the other colors announced several months ago — ivory (off-white), moss (green), and navy — are arriving by the end of this month. They’ll also cost $249.95. 

Apple tells me you’ll be able to order them online beginning on August 22nd at 12:01AM PT / 3:01AM ET. All three new Powerbeats Pro colors will start shipping on August 30th and should be in Apple’s retail stores on that day as well.

Jeff purchased the PowerBeats Pro earlier in black, and kept telling me how great they are, so I’m glad the version that will match my weird “must have navy/midnight blue for all the things” is coming out so I can finally get on his level.