eD! Thomas

Excels Equally in Awesomeness & Modesty

Katie Porter’s Whiteboard

March 13, 2020

When you woke up this morning and put on your bland suit in preparation for your hearing, I bet you looked yourself in the mirror and thought: Today’s the day. Katie Porter’s not going to get me.
Well, I’m Representative Katie Porter’s whiteboard, and I’ve got a message scrawled upon my glistening façade: We’re about to kick your ass.

The exchange between Rep. Katie Porter of California and an official from the CDC during a hearing yesterday was awesome. This monologue from McSweeney’s Internet Tendency is an equally-awesome companion piece.

If you haven’t seen Rep. Porter mopping the floor with the officials from the CDC yet, you should 100% watch the video below before you read the piece on McSweeney’s. It’s worth your time, I promise.

I did the math: a full battery of coronavirus testing costs at minimum $1,331.

I also did the legal research: the Administration has the authority to make testing free for every American TODAY.

I secured a commitment from a high-level Trump official that they’d actually do it. pic.twitter.com/RmolCtmNbG
— Rep. Katie Porter (@RepKatiePorter) March 12, 2020
Lords of the Dance

January 13, 2020

I might not have liked Joker, and I didn’t like Spider-Man 3 (just like any right-minded person), but I love this nonsense.

I love it so much.

Source: ComicBook.com
Last Week Tonight: SLAPP Suits

November 11, 2019

After spending two years engaged in a legal battle with a coal executive who was less-than-enthused with a giant squirrel telling him to “eat shit”, John Oliver finally shares the details of what happened, explains SLAPP lawsuits, and ends the segment in a way that ensured that I’d have to post it.

I had no choice, people.
Microsoft the Musical

September 19, 2019

The bit in the beginning where they consider Bill Gates less of a person and more of an idea is kinda weird, but the part where they make fun of Windows Phone really makes up for it.
An iPhone 11 Pro Review For Dogs (And Their Owners)

September 18, 2019

Buzzfeed News, with the sort of tech review I can get behind:

My dogs and I have spent the past few days with the iPhone 11 Pro Max, and I think they would agree when I say that it is an excellent camera for humans who enjoy photographing dogs. As a test of camera performance, dogs are my gold standard: They don’t stay still, and capturing their details (fur in particular) is a challenge. Not only is the iPhone 11 Pro Max capable of taking dog photos of great variety and visual accuracy, it can take them in the low-light conditions dogs so enjoy and with studio effects that do a good job of making them appear as adorable as they truly are.

This has replaced the TechCrunch review of the iPhone 6 and 6 Plus as my favorite iPhone review of all time, which is a ranking that I’m not proud of having but what can you do, y’know?

What I imagine my life will be like in the future having admitted to ranking iPhone reviews.
Gourmet Pop Rocks

August 27, 2019

This is some top-notch “I do not want to do this content but I will do this content because it is my job” content.

Also I learned more about Pop Rocks than I ever thought possible, so that’s a pretty solid bonus.
Apple Announces Release Date for PowerBeats Pro in Navy, Other Colors I Don’t Care About

August 20, 2019

At this point I was kinda figuring Apple wouldn’t announce the release date of the PowerBeats Pro in navy before my next work trip, but I was mercifully wrong!

So far, the excellent Beats Powerbeats Pro true wireless earbuds have only been available in black, but the other colors announced several months ago — ivory (off-white), moss (green), and navy — are arriving by the end of this month. They’ll also cost $249.95.
Apple tells me you’ll be able to order them online beginning on August 22nd at 12:01AM PT / 3:01AM ET. All three new Powerbeats Pro colors will start shipping on August 30th and should be in Apple’s retail stores on that day as well.

Jeff purchased the PowerBeats Pro earlier in black, and kept telling me how great they are, so I’m glad the version that will match my weird “must have navy/midnight blue for all the things” is coming out so I can finally get on his level.
As a thank you to everyone who wished me a happy birthday this week, please enjoy this photo of Sunshine and I wearing matching party hats.

August 10, 2019

via Instagram
The Next Nostalgic Cash-Grab: The TurboGrafx-16 Mini

June 12, 2019

Konami will be releasing a mini version of the TurboGrafx-16 later this year:

Konami has announced the latest in the slew of shrunk-down retro consoles, the TurboGrafx-16 Mini. Six games have been announced so far for the system, which will be released in Japan as the PC Engine Mini and in Europe as the PC Engine Core Grafx. It’ll have two USB ports for controllers and support a five-way multiplayer adapter.

I’d like to tell you that I won’t buy this, but if it ends up including any of the Bonk games, I’d just be lying.
Well Fork.

June 8, 2019

Dear Residents of #TheGoodPlace Neighborhood 12358W… pic.twitter.com/UVsm5x704p
— The Good Place is taking it sleazy (@nbcthegoodplace) June 8, 2019

While I’m glad The Good Place will be ending on its own terms, I’m bummed that it’s ending — it’s the best show on TV, and we’ll all be worse off when it’s over.

Also, if you’re not watching it, you need to get on that shirt right forking now.

…that will make more sense when you watch the show, I swear.