Categories
Technology

iOS and iPadOS 14: The MacStories Review

Federico Vittici’s annual small-book-length iOS and iPadOS review is now out — I haven’t read it yet, but it’s so good each year that I’m just going to link you to it anyway.

Categories
Nearly Coherent Technology

Nearly Coherent: You Got Doodie Hands

There’s a new episode of Nearly Coherent!

eD! and Jeff get all nerd-horny over everything announced at WWDC. It’s real steamy, folks!

Come for my opinions on all the WWDC stuff, stay for the message Jeff now wants to use as his bedtime alarm tone!

Categories
Technology

Apple Announces iPad Pro Updates

Apple announced a new version of the iPad Pro today, and, folks, spare a thought for my bank account, ’cause I wants it.

In the way of actual updates, it’s more or less what we’d all expect — a faster A12Z Bionic processor, WiFi 6 networking, which (with the right router) can allow download speeds of 1.2 Gbps (up from 866Mbps), and support for 30 different LTE cellular networking bands, up from 29.

That one band will make all the difference, I’m sure!1Full disclosure: I am not sure.

Apple also announced mouse and trackpad support will come with iPadOS 13.4, which will be released on March 24th — that’s the one thing Jeff has been asking me about for months, so he’ll be extremely happy with that.

Finally, Apple announced a new Magic Keyboard, which won’t be out until May, which sucks ’cause I want it now, dammit!

Would’ja look at that thing?!

It has a trackpad, backlit keys (that use the scissor switches that Apple has mercifully gone back to on the 16″ MacBook Pro and new MacBook Air, also announced today), a USB-C port with passthrough power for your iPad, and viewing angles that I cannot wait to try, just take my money Tim Apple.

There’s a bunch more details about the new iPad Pro on MacStories. Give it a read, but hide your Apple Card while you do.

Categories
Linkin' Log Technology

An iPhone 11 Pro Review For Dogs (And Their Owners)

Buzzfeed News, with the sort of tech review I can get behind:

My dogs and I have spent the past few days with the iPhone 11 Pro Max, and I think they would agree when I say that it is an excellent camera for humans who enjoy photographing dogs. As a test of camera performance, dogs are my gold standard: They don’t stay still, and capturing their details (fur in particular) is a challenge. Not only is the iPhone 11 Pro Max capable of taking dog photos of great variety and visual accuracy, it can take them in the low-light conditions dogs so enjoy and with studio effects that do a good job of making them appear as adorable as they truly are.

This has replaced the TechCrunch review of the iPhone 6 and 6 Plus as my favorite iPhone review of all time, which is a ranking that I’m not proud of having but what can you do, y’know?

the simpsons nerd GIF
What I imagine my life will be like in the future having admitted to ranking iPhone reviews.
Categories
Entertainment Meta News Technology

Nearly Coherent: Midnight Green Is the Dave of Colors

There’s a new episode of Nearly Coherent!

eD!, Jeff, and Dave talk about the new iPhones 11, Apple Watch Series 5, and all the other shenanigans from Apple’s event on Tuesday.

Find out how many shiny new things I’ll own by next week, it’ll shock and amaze you!

Categories
Linkin' Log News Technology

Apple Announces Release Date for PowerBeats Pro in Navy, Other Colors I Don’t Care About

At this point I was kinda figuring Apple wouldn’t announce the release date of the PowerBeats Pro in navy before my next work trip, but I was mercifully wrong!

So far, the excellent Beats Powerbeats Pro true wireless earbuds have only been available in black, but the other colors announced several months ago — ivory (off-white), moss (green), and navy — are arriving by the end of this month. They’ll also cost $249.95. 

Apple tells me you’ll be able to order them online beginning on August 22nd at 12:01AM PT / 3:01AM ET. All three new Powerbeats Pro colors will start shipping on August 30th and should be in Apple’s retail stores on that day as well.

Jeff purchased the PowerBeats Pro earlier in black, and kept telling me how great they are, so I’m glad the version that will match my weird “must have navy/midnight blue for all the things” is coming out so I can finally get on his level.

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Entertainment Meta News Technology

Nearly Coherent: Two Week Old Thoughts

There’s a new episode of Nearly Coherent!

eD!, Jeff, and Val talk about a thing that eD! thought to mention after Apple’s event that he didn’t, so please pretend he said it then. Thank you for your consideration in this matter.

Sure, by the time this came out what I was saying about iTunes was all over the tech blogs and stuff, but this was recorded before that, so there, nyah.

Categories
Meta Technology

Nearly Coherent: Medical Marvel

While there’s a bunch of things we talk about in this episode, I also talk about my reactions to the Apple event on Tuesday, and it gets spicy, in a very nerdy way.

You can give it a listen here, if you’re so inclined.

Categories
Entertainment Meta Politics Technology

Nearly Coherent: The Hundredth Episode

Did you know I had a podcast? If not, surprise! You can go listen to our 59th episode, which is actually our 100th episode, right now!

Categories
Entertainment News Politics Technology

Nearly Coherent 037: The Kimmy Gibbler of Worlds

This episode is proof-positive we’re in the Darkest Timeline. Sorry!


Trump v. Sportsball

No one is more upset than I am at Trump’s feud with the NFL and Stephan Curry, both because I’m a hard-line supporter of the First Amendment and because now I know things about sports, which is the last thing in the world I wanted.

In case you missed it because you’re the luckiest son of a bitch on Earth, here’s a good explainer of Trump versus the NFL, and here’s what’s what with Trump versus the NBA, both from Vox.com.

If you’ll excuse me, I have to go find a not-ugly Golden State Warriors hat.

It's me.

The Apple Watch’s Heart Rate Tracking

The Apple Watch got a whole bunch of great updates with watchOS 4, including showing resting heart rate, walking heart rate, recovery rate, and will even give you a head’s up when your heartbeat is spiking for no reason whatsoever. However, these features only work on the Series 1, Series 2, and new Series 3 Watches… the Series 0, which is the original Apple Watch, doesn’t have the hardware capable of handling that.

This isn’t really a big deal — you can always expect pretty big leaps in technical capabilities between the first generation of a device and the second or third, and you can especially expect it when the device is made by Apple. The people who might be a little annoyed by this, though, are the people who bought the first generation solid gold Apple Watch Edition, which started at $18,000. They might have expected a little more longevity out of their purchase.

Then again, they were dumb enough to buy an $18,000+ Apple Watch, so they’re kinda getting what they deserve, honestly.

A $350 Jean Jacket

Jean jackets are back, much to my dismay, and Levi’s released their new Commuter Trucker denim jacket yesterday, which retails $350. Admittedly, it’s a jacket with a li’l technological trick up its sleeve… by swiping or tapping the fabrics on the left cuff, you can control your smartphone via Bluetooth. It’s also made in partnership with Google, so you don’t have to worry about the technical know-how of the fine folks at Levi’s in the hopes that the thing will work, which is nice.

That said, for $350, you can also buy an Apple Watch and not look like a time traveler from 1997, which might be a better look all-around, if you ask me. But hey, it’s your money, spend it how you want, weirdo!


There’s plenty more in the episode to entertain and probably horrify you, so visit Nearly Coherent or wherever you get your podcast fix to give it a listen.